Ottawa ON — Thinking he would never have to stoop to this level, a panicked Justin Trudeau has begun adopting a dog at every campaign stop in an effort to pick up the dog people vote. Before calling the early election, the confident Prime Minister was certain he could get a majority without ever having to touch a puppy. Now with just three weeks to go and trailing in some polls, the need to pander to that crowd is becoming quite clear.
With Erin O’Toole killing it in the animal department, it has become evident that you can’t underestimate the dog lovers. The race is so close now that one photo-op with a dog can be the difference between winning and losing . A photo-op with fives dogs is five times more effective.
Taking this information into consideration, Trudeau realizes that in order to turn the tables in less than three weeks, he will have to adopt one dog at every campaign stop from now until Election Day. Seeing a dog adopted from your city by the Prime Minister is practically free votes. So far he has five dogs and had little to no leash tangling yet which tells him he can handle many more pups. The one fear the campaign has is that after 20 or so dogs, it may come across as blatant pandering but with a little rehearsing, it should come across a genuine.
The goal right now is to grab as many different breeds as possible because people are choosy and like nothing more than to see someone with a dog breed they love. A few ferocious ones wouldn’t hurt either considering the obnoxious crowds that have been showing up.
After this week, taking poll numbers into account, the Trudeau campaign will reassess where they are at with the dog vote and will either increase or decrease their dog adoptions based on those numbers. We will continue to monitor this situation.