Until COVID, nobody thought a little tab full of spit was a bad thing to pass around. We would pass it around to our friends to prove that we won a coffee all the while enough DNA has transferred around to place us at the scene of any nearby crime. Now we have a digital version where every roll is a winner. Each morning, I rolled up a digital rim, and here are the ratings for each prize. I rated each prize on my famous 5 donut scale with ? being terrible and ?? being not terrible. We will never see anything beyond that so let’s end it there.
Monday: $20.00 Skullcandy Voucher
At first, there is some initial excitement but a quick search of the Skullcandy website revealed these aren’t even candy, they’re headphones. Twenty bucks doesn’t even get you replacement parts so a please play again would have saved me from even looking it up. Technically this prize is a net loss.
(Rating : ? )
Tuesday: Free Coffee
Who can complain about a free coffee? Put this down as a nice win. In no way can this possibly come back to bite me in the ass.
Apparently the free coffee from yesterday doesn’t get you a new roll. We don’t come for the coffee, we come for the gambling addiction. Give me a roll.
Thursday : 5 Tim Horton’s Points
Basically this is the equivalent of when you give coupons to your wife for back rubs. She ain’t getting no back rub.
Friday: 5 Tim Horton’s Points
No really honey, these coupons are valid. To prove it to you, here’s another one.
( Rating: ?? we combined yesterday’s rating with todays )
Saturday: Free Coffee
After high hopes and lots of praying for the Crave subscription, I ended up with a free coffee for tomorrow so while today was just ok, tomorrow’s day will start out great.
(Rating : ? ?)
Sunday: Oh Fuck Off
We used the free coffee and didn’t get a roll. Fool me once.